Words from Josh: First Memories

To My Dearest Most Precious Sweet Lacey,

I love you more than I fear I'll ever be able to tell you. They just don't make words for these feelings. I love the memories we have created together, and cherish them as the prized possession they are. I remember the first night I ever met you, you were wearing that white holy-jumper and jeans, you had your hair up at the back and your fringe across your forehead. I remember how exotic and mysteriously beautiful you looked. I didn't even entertain the thought of ever having you. Why would I bother wasting my time even pretending I could have someone as beautiful, eloquent and confident as you? I remember listening to you talk, thinking how funny you were. I remember the awkward embarrassing moment of you walking into my room seeing my nerdy collection of armour and making jokes at my expense, and trying it all on!

I remember my anxious feeling I would get of hanging out with you as I slowly got to unravel the mystique identity of Lacey Hilliard, I was so nervous just to be with you, I didn't even want to sit next to you! I remember trying to distance myself from you, knowing I would never be able to live up to a person of equal worth as you. I still try very hard but feel I fall short. I thank the Lord every day for blessing me with you.

I remember THAT night of all nights. We were in the car, my mind was racing. I was trying to talk myself into it but was scared. Scared of rejection. I remember finally getting up the courage to reach over to hold the hand of the most exquisitely beautiful girl I had ever laid eyes on, and to my disbelief, she held my hand back! I remember the warm feeling that coursed through my body and my heart swell with affection and earning to be with you. What I experienced at that moment I didn't until later interpret as love. I remember darling, my mind to think even further, a kiss. I had to kiss you, but how? Where? And ultimately, how will she react? I devised a plan on that last sad drive full of mixed emotions back to your (nanny family's) house. We got out of the car, I walked you to your door, I looked at you and wigged out at the last minute and went in for a hug. Little did I know that you had other ideas! I remember trying to hug you and you interception me with a kiss on the lips! (And that kiss, turned into two then three...) LACEY! How glad I am that you took that initiative! I refuse to even think of what might have become of us if you didn't do that. I knew right then and there I wanted more of those! And would always want more of those! I walked back to the car, gently touching my lips with my tongue, smiling a big wide goofy smile, I had kissed you.

These are but a few of my favourite first memories of you my love.

Love, Joshua Peter Williams